Just give me a cape and call me a superhero because I'm about to start saving lives.
Hello everyone, and Happy Mondaying!!!
Today starts a new era in the Damn It, Sam experience. I asked my readers for help with topics and they came through BIG TIME! It appears that I am going to start giving some advice! Isn't that fabulous? I think it is anyway. I'm pretty smart. I've observed some things.
I know stuff...
Anyway, the first question came quick and it has my pressure up:
"Damn It, Sam,
My future ex husband wants me to pay for our divorce, and is asking me for $500 of my income tax refund because I filed our son. He cheated on me numerous time throughout our marriage. This last time, he got his mistress pregnant and left me with our four children to live with her. He said he wants to "see where this relationship can go." Should I screenshot all the messages of him begging for money to his “girlfriend “ or just be an adult and let him keep begging and her thinking she has an amazing man/ father of her children?"
Let me take a moment to correct my vision. I just rolled my eyes so hard, I might pass out and wake up with a migraine. And, as hard as this is for me, I'm gonna try to help this baby out without using bad words.
Okay, I'm ready now...
What THEE ENTIRE HECK is going on here?
There are so many emotions raging through me, but I just remembered that I promised not to curse. So first of all, NO YOU WILL NOT.
That about covers it. You WILL NOT give him any money. If he left you, that means he has complete confidence in himself that he can live without you and that includes your money. He doesn't need your money! That is for you and your babies. Any excuse he can produce to try and sell to you would be irrelevant and worthy of a good ol' belly laugh in his stupid face. Not only is he not deserving of your money, but he isn't even deserving of a response other than HELL NAH!
Secondly, NO YOU WILL NOT to the screenshots. That woman isn't worth your time either. She knowingly slept with a married and man and is knowingly carrying his baby. That should have given her a clue that he wasn't worth her time but... whatever. Common sense isn't as common as I would hope it could be. Even if you did send them to her, she wouldn't believe you and, even if she did, it wouldn't change anything. She wanted him and she got him. Let her take all of him. She will find out for herself what type of man she lowered her standards for but it isn't your problem. That's his choice. Make him live with it.
The only "yes" I will give you is to pay for the divorce. Consider it an investment into your future. You are paying to erase your chalkboard and wipe that sucker down for a clean slate. An investment like that can't yield anything but an awesome return. And, once you're free, forget him. Literally. Don't harp on the choices you made or fall for his petty games. He will try his best to get a rise out of you but block him if you have to. Wounds need time to heal and space to breathe so give yourself as much of both as you need. If you keep giving him your energy, not only will you not heal correctly, but you won't have the energy for your babies that need you and for yourself. You need you more than anyone else. He made himself irrelevant when he betrayed your trust. He doesn't deserve the time it would take to blink your eyes in his direction.
Woooooosaaaaahhhh. I need to relax and relate and release after that one...