Grand Rising and hello friends *waves*
I know that today is Monday, and that I usually do my book reviews on Fridays.
Since Fridays have been declared "The BigGirl Talk Podcast Day" here at DamnItSam.com, things have changed. And as my mom loves to say, "It's a woman's prerogative to change her mind.
Anyway, the read for October definitely went in a different direction than I have gone in the past and, if I'm being extremely honest, I really didn't want to like this book. Like really really. I take issue with any man that tried to tell a woman what she is doing wrong with her life. I don't appreciate so many of the "self-help" books that encourage women to change themselves into what a man desires. As a matter of fact, just the title alone was causing me to throw some serious shade in it's direction. But, just as much as I wanted to hate It, I actually loved it.
Let's start with the basics:
*Gold Medal Winner of the 2018 ELit Book Award for Best Self Help Book!* "Men Don't Love Women Like You" is a brutally honest manual that will transform you from typical to priceless. The secrets in this book will guide you step by step as you learn what men think, how to counter their bullsh*t, and the exact ways to turn the table in your favor. No matter who the man is, how young, old, rich, or popular he may be, this book will show you how to attain power over him. From the first meeting to the first date. From a new relationship hitting its first bump to an old relationship on its last legs. You will learn to dominate men in ways you never dreamed of. You will become what you were always meant to be A Goddess in the flesh.
That was the description from the Amazon.com and it definitely describes this book perfectly. Talk about being brutally honest. I actually had to put this book down after the first few chapters because it made me feel super stupid, and that's not an easy task. I have always prided myself on being open-minded and intelligent but... I felt like a dummy after several I began.
And that's not case though. The manner in which this book was written is not meant to make any woman feel stupid. It was actually written to empower and educate women to become their best selves; not to get a man's attention at all. Mr. Lambert uses blantant truth to show every woman how important it is to know herself, love herself and live up to the very expectations that she desires to find in the man of her dreams. I mean, how can I expect to someone to love and please me, if I have no diea how I want to be loved or what I want?
That's one of those "Things that make you go hmmmm?" that I used to hear so much about.
"You are a woman;
you can withstand immeasurable amounts of pain,
show unconditional love, give birth to life.
You. Are. The. Shit!"
The good points in this book overflow from the very beginning. Mr. Lambert helps women understand how men think, what they want and even how they usually go about getting the things that they want. He breaks down every aspect of dating from the initial hello, to the first phone conversation, the first couple of dates and even the first sexual encounter. He tells us what we should look for, pay attention to and even how to listen to what is being said. Sure, some of the pages are filled with opinions and advice, but most of it is invaluable, and given in a very understanding way without feeling disrespectful or condescending. But there is one overall theme that this book has and I can absolutely get all the way behind:
Every good relationship that any of us will ever have in life, first begins with not only self-love, but self-acceptance.
We think that we need to be a certain shape or a certain weight, reach a certain socioeconomic status, obtain a degree, reach a tax bracket or get to a certain place in life when they are ready for the man that they feel they deserve.
That is not the case.
"The true Glo up only happens in one part of your body- the mind."
There is no place in life that you need to reach but self-acceptance.
There is nothing that you cannot have when you make the decision to get it. There is no secret or cheat code to having the man of your dreams. This book proves that.
There are so many aspects of this book that made sense. For example, Mr. Lambert states many ways that women fool themselves into believing that they are not good enough to obtain the attention of a man that they would like to have a relationship with.
That is not the case. Truth is, there are available men everywhere. There is a nasty myth going around that there are no good men in the world. Harsh untruth! The truth is that we might not be in a position to attract the men that we want because we aren't ready for them.
And there is nothing wrong with that.
There is nothing wrong with taking some time to examine your life and see that maybe you are not in a good place for a relationship. Maybe you need to work on your self-esteem, realizing that your self-worth DOES NOT include a man. Maybe you need to fully heal from some past relationships or childhood traumas. And maybe there is no trauma; it's just not time yet. In any of these scenarios are perfectly okay. Regardless to what your parents, or your friends, or your children or anyone else tell's you, there is nothing wrong with being single. At all.
I could honestly go on and on about this book. Lord knows, I have so many highlights, the entire book looks pink, blue and yellow. But I won't go on. I really want you to read this book and judge for yourself. I HIGHLY recommend it. When I was a teenager, my mom made me read the book "He's Just Not That Into You". I think if I paid attention to that book the way that I paid attention to this one, I would have saved myself quite a few heartbreaks and possibly even a marriage. That's how highly rated this book is. It reinforces everything that I have been saying:
No matter your size, you can have whomever and whatever you desire. Once you realize how much badassery you have. It’s all on the confidence. Once you realize your value, you stop taking what comes along and start demanding the best. Which is what you deserve. And this book is the perfect manual to help you realize exactly how amazing you are, so you can move from basic to Spartan.
Thank you, GL Lambert, for sharing this book with us. The information that I gained is not only invaluable, but tested and proven to work!
"Men Don't Love Women Like You" by GL Lambert is available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle download by clicking here for a quick preview. Let me know what you think by emailing me at firstname.lastname@example.org, or DM me on Instagram by following me @theedamnitsam.
Also, if you have any book recommendations that you want me to read and review, let me know. I love suggestions :) And check back Friday when the new episode of "The BigGirl Talk Podcast" drops...