God is good, amen?
Can I get an AMEN???
Grand rising, beautiful people. It is a beautiful day in the neighborhood. God is still working miracles in the land of the living.
And no, I have not lost my whole mind.
I had a very interesting conversation with the Starter Husband on my way home from work last night. Yes, I did answer the phone. Actually, it was more a case of, Sam-forgot-to-reblock-him-after-he-dropped-the-kids-off- Sunday.
It happens. I have a lot on my mind.
But what does that have to do with me being in an annoyingly good mood? Well... Brace yourselves for the impact:
He apologized. To me.
Let me know when you pick yourself up off the floor. Okay. You ready?
Yeah, I had to pause when he said those two magic words as well. "I'm Sorry" came out of his mouth and I actually slowed to a stop at a red light and looked out of the window. I was almost positive I saw a pig walking down the street sprout wings and take off! It must have been my imagination but I looked again to make sure that God hadn't cracked the sky and the end wasn't near.
I'm still not so sure...
Granted, I’m not exactly sure what he was apologizing for. The words "I'm sorry" came out of his mouth and I got stuck. I didn’t really hear the next part. Had to shake my head to make my ears start working again so I could pay attention the rest of the conversation.
It's weird how you train yourself to tune out certain sounds. White noise, it's called. As a mom, sometimes I don't hear my kids talking. Don't hear crickets creaking at night or birds chirping in the morning when the windows are open. Don't hear the commercials when I watch television. Sometimes your brain just learns when to turn off your auditory system for things it doesn't want to process.
That's how it is with the Starter Husband.
I got so used to tuning out his random babbling and bad words that, when I heard him speaking last night, I had to tap my phone screen to make sure that it was actually him who called.
Why am I telling you this? Not just because I wanted to tell his business on social media, because I usually like to pretend that he doesn't exist most days. But I want you to understand the concept that everything changes. Things that you have been praying for and hoping for and waiting for and wanting will eventually come to past and, most times, it will happen when you least expect it. No matter what it is or how long it takes, when you forget about it is when it manifests. Because you aren't worrying anymore. Worry is a way of guaranteeing that the bad thing you're scared will happen, because you are giving that bad thing all of your energy. Release that thing, that person, that situation and watch the Universe fix it for you. It happens every time.
I had gotten to the point where I gave up the hope of successful co-parenting. That must have been something that only happened on TV and a figment of my imagination. It couldn't possibly happen for me. We are 2 TOTALLY different people, who probably should have never gotten married in the first place, let alone had babies. But we did and we did. Things happen. And no, I don't believe that we will ever be friends. Some bridges are burned and need not be rebuilt. Everything happens in perfect time; when it's supposed to happen and how it's supposed to happen. You just have to be open to receive it.
But what's also amazing to me is that, just when I gave up all hope of civility, he called and apologized. Which proves another point:
I was right all along...